Tonight, after finishing my homework (reading about how to outstandingly edit a magazine equals world's best homework) and pondering my potential at being a real freelance writer someday, I settled into bed around 11:15.
Two minutes later, my stomach began to make that too-familiar call: I'M HUNGRY! Those don't-you-dare-ignore-me-and-just-fall-asleep hunger pangs that I've lately become so intimate with.
And so I'm up again. I know it's not desperately late or anything like you hear pregnant women talk about, but I would still much rather be in my warm bed right now.
Lately I can't even make it through Sunday School without leaving the room because a) I am burning up, b) I need a snack to even be able to focus, or c) both a and b.
I keep telling myself things like "At least you're not overly gigantic" or "It's worth noting that you no longer throw up every morning."
But man, when you are scarfing down
It's time to figure some things out, namely, how to keep myself from feeling starved all the time (despite the fact that I eat all day long). (I am now chomping ravenously on a Granny Smith apple.)
We'll call them my Tips for Avoiding Insanity By Eating Food, Pregnancy Edition. Maybe one of you will benefit too. Heaven knows my future pregnant self (as in, myself tomorrow) needs to realize and remember some things.
Tip #1: When pregnant, eat a second dinner. Yes, a full second helping of that night's feast or, if you're lucky, another tupperware-encased delight you have saved in the fridge (see Tip #2). Of course, eat only what you feel hungry for, but for me, if I try to go to bed when it's been four hours since I ate dinner, I ain't sleeping.
Tip #2: Keep appealing, protein-rich, healthy meals ready to go in the fridge. Since I never get tired of spaghetti, I plan to keep a vat of it in my refrigerator. Plus a big container of homemade vegetable stew (with chicken or beans or both) and maybe even some leftover broccoli cheese casserole. The trick here is to make these ready-at-a-moment's-notice meals out of food you generally love to eat. Don't kid yourself into thinking that you'll eat quinoa salad with cherries and pistachios when you're totally famished (unless that's your leftover of choice, of course). Having meals like these at the ready is easiest if you make double the amount when making a particular item for dinner. And if you don't like leftovers, well, you may just have to get over that for a few months.
Tip #3: Never leave home without stashing a generous snack in your purse; you will get hungry before returning home. My usual go-to is a string cheese or sticks of cheddar, a green apple cut into slices or a baby orange, and either Triscuits or a granola bar (have you tried these delicious babies from Costco?). I also make sure to top off my 32-ounce Camelbak bottle with ice cold water. Every day I consider not bringing a snack with me, a delusion my subconscious calls "toughing it out." And then I smile to myself when I do get hungry in the middle of class and I have adequate sustenance in my bag.
Tip #4: I don't know if this is true for every pregnant woman, but I've found that I need a substantial snack / small meal at least every two hours (if not every hour). Yes, I literally feel like I'm eating constantly when I stick to this rule, but I am much happier in the long run when I do. Adjust the size of your snack / meal according to what you feel your body needs at that time. You may just need a handful of almonds and a handful of dried cranberries. Or you may need a bowl of spaghetti and a green salad (see Tip #2).
Tip #5: When you're hungry, eat. Even if it's in the middle of church and you didn't bring any food with you. Go find some food and feed it to yourself (or have a patient husband find the food and feed it to you). Even if you (or patient husband) have to drive home! In the middle of church! Heaven forbid! Eat. Just do it. You'll feel better.
And with that, my friends, I say sayonara to you.
I'm going to sleep with a stomach that is happy and a mind that is at peace.
Good night, dear ones.